the lost art of letter writing
I sometimes wonder if I am the only person that still writes letters on pen and paper. I write them mostly to my husband, at times expressing love, or anger, or confusion. Sometimes I write them out of pure emotional need, when he is not about. The beauty is he can tuck them away, where he pleases, and read them again. He can look at my handwriting usually reflective of the emotion at hand, and the small hearts, or angry exclamation points and know exactly how i felt at that moment of writing. And when i a m gone, they may be looked at again; and when he is gone, they may be found and read.
So I wonder if I am alone at writing letters.
But moving my thoughts forward I have also released the information superhighway has made it possible for me to foster and nurture some friendships, at a pace that letter writing would not support. I thin if we craft our electronic communications as well as we would a letter, with the same emotions, humor, anger, coyness and thoughts then we can continue to grow with others in actual friendships.
Thinking back- I remember a family members a great, possibly great great, grandma called ‘Babe’. In letters found at my paternal grandparents house there were great correspondences between Babe nd her husband. He traveled as a salesman, I believe, and she was unstable eventually institutionalized. But there they letters were, outpourings of love and emptiness due to the days apart- and these letters kept them both going in their relationship.
Eventually this type of relationship separation was tended to by phone. More immediately gratifying; you could hear a voice and express your emotions. So separation becomes slighty more bearable- or at least until the next phone call. Then came along the cell phone, and well your perception of separation changes as it now includes hours vs days or weeks. No person is out of contact for any length of time- and we all go crazy if the phone is turned off and we repeatedly call only to get voicemail.
So now back to 2010…internet dating, and every kind of social network imaginable, and in humor of “he’s not that into you”, the ability to blow you off with at least 7 different versions of technology, can you really foster a relationship with a person, you may have never met, on the computer?
In the past I would have said hands down-NO- but today I feel differently. As long as the parties involved share with truthful intent, common ideas, similar humor, and interests that are also similar then I belive YES you can form, forge, and maintain a relationship over the internet.
I came online for 1 purpose, to get info, and have remained and grown my relationship with my computer-and some very distant in place, but completely in my heart friends. They know more about my everyday struggles then my family, share their own, have some in common, and help me survive. I presumed this would all go away, but to date it hasn’t. The level of commitment by each member varies there are few hard feelings, and we all understand that there is the other segments of each of our lives.
Today I find my self, a bit teary eyed in knowing I am going to meet a friend I have ‘chatted’ with daily for more than a year, been encouraged by, held up by, supported, brought to tears in laughter and even gotten in trouble over. She is coming to NY, and when I think of our initial meeting, the hello & hug, I know I will tear up. I belive this because we have both shared, been honest, and put forth the effort to be there for each other.
But in 2010, don’t we all still get excited to receive a package ia snail-mail, with a handwritten note and the signature of a loved one. Or look back on old greeting cards and feel weepy as we view the signature or a loved one that has passed.
Maybe it is not the ideal way to keep a relationship, but neither was being apart and writing letters.
Maybe while she is here, I’ll pen her a note! one that she can tuck away and peek at in times of need-regardless of online status, wi-fi and social networks.
